LJW Weekday Rumble

**No Chance in Hell plays as Mr.McNasti makes his way to the ring.**
Mr.McNasti: I'm sure many of you saw the heinous actions that occured at Screwed Up and from this day forth I don't want that name mentioned in MY arena! So on to bigger and better news, tonight will kick off a tournament for the new number one contender for "Flying"Dick Tsao's LJW Championship. The matches have been set for this tournament and they go as followed if you'll look up on the LJW Tron:

Black Inches
vs
Hargrove

Triple M
vs
"The Lebanese Love Machine"Joe Hakim


Stevie D
vs
"The Sadistic Sex Machine"Steve Hakim

Browning
vs
Jose "The Illegal Alien" Sanchez

RSC
vs
Soulblade


Rayther
vs
Juan Carlos

Asombroso Azul
vs
Ice Diggity

Crispy
vs
Colt 45

I would also like to take this time to announce the LJW Women's Championship Battle Royal which shall take place soon. But let's kick into some of this tournament!

**Slam by Onyx plays and Crispy is first to make his way out to the ring. Then we hear Outlaws Like Us and Colt 45 comes to the ring. Colt quickly dives for Crispy on the way in but trips and falls hard to the mat.Two of his remaining 13 teeth have fallen out and he seems to be knocked out as soon as the bell rings.Crispy rolls him up and gets the quickest victory in LJW history.**
Winner: Crispy
Scoops Sullivan:Wow.Thats all I can say to that.Lets get to our next match.

**Asombros Azul rides solo on a Juan Deere lawnmower to the ring as Gasolina plays. Slam by Onyx plays and Ice Diggity grooves his way out to the ring. Ice Diggity steps in and as the bell rings he does the robot to a bewildered Asombroso and then pokes him in the eyes. Diggity then does the running man and starts to shuffle as he punches Azul in the face. As he goes for the next punch Azul ducks it and kicks Diggity in the stomach and then hits a rolling clothesline on him. Azul goes for a DDT but Diggity reverses it and flips Azul on his back but only gets a 2 count.Ice Diggity then drops to the floor and does the worm but Azul rolls out of the ring just in time.Diggity tries to grab Azul from inside the ring but Azul grabs Diggity's head and chokes him on the rope, he then jumps up to the top rope and dives off with a hurracanrana.Diggity gets back up but is met with the Blue Light Special from Asombroso Azul for the win.**
Winner: Asombroso Azul

**We head backstage to see the names posted for the Women's Championship 10 Girl Guantlet Match.
We see the names read: Whompus,Mamacita Michelle,AU Chick, Blowfish,EZ Mac,Miss Independent,The Xtreme,Basketcase,Shamoo,and Bad Ass Brooke Austin.**
Mamacita Michelle: There's no use of you gringos even trying to be in this, I'm gonna win!
EZ Mac: You're just as much of a gringo as the rest of us.
Mamacita Michelle: Oh no this punta didn't!
EZ Mac: What you call me,wantabe?!
**A catfight breaks out backstage and the other girls and officials break them up.**

**As we head back to the ring we see Rayther and Juan Carlos already in the ring. Rayther dropkicks Juan Carlos out of the ring from the get go and then suicide dives onto Juan Carlos from inside the ring as the crowd pops for Rayther. Rayther rolls Juan Carlos back in the ring and hits the Rocker Dropper on him in the middle for the win.**
Winner: Rayther

**We gear up for Soulblade who comes out to My Spirit Will Go On as smoke and fog covers the arena. Then the Imperial March plays and a carriage with two white horses comes out and Robert Scott Connally comes out of the carriage in lavish white ring attire,a towel around his neck,and a cigar in his mouth as the fans greet him with boos. He climbs in the ring and the quick Soulblade begins to tear him up with kicks but RSC, who is also sporting a bandage on his head, overpowers Soulblade into the corner and hits a running clothesline. He then attempts a powerbomb but Soulblade reverses it into a DDT! RSC is out and Soulblade hops up quickly and goes to the top for the Onimusha as RSC pulls the referee close to him, then "The Man of the Year"Haynes runs out and pushes Soulblade off the top rope and RSC quickly gets up and knocks Soulblade out with a powerbomb. He then puts Soulblade in the Crossface Chickenwing and makes Soulblade tap out.**
Winner: Robert Scott Connally
RSC: I'd like to introduce you all to my new Board of Directors..."Jacked" Josh Haynes!
JH: Thank you, Mr.Connally. I believe this is the beginning of a new era for all of LJW.

**Browning makes his way out to the ring with a pipe in his hand to Like Toy Soldiers then we hear Gasolina and Jose Sanchez comes out accomponied by Mamacita Michelle. The match kicks off and Browning quickly tackles Sanchez and then jumps out of the ring and chases Michelle around then Sanchez does a baseball slide to Browning and climbs out but Browning throws him into the steel stairs. Browning is in control and rolls Sanchez back into the ring and drops him with the Skeet Shoot then EZ Mac runs out and attacks Michelle outside and another catfight ensues! The referee tries to break them up and Browning is distracted as well as Jose Sanchez gets up and grabs Browning's pipe and whacks Browning in the back of the head with it! Sanchez grabs the referee and rolls Browning up for the win.**
Winner:Jose "The Illegal Alien" Sanchez
Chris Byrd: W-w-w-wow, a cheap victory for that Sanchez..I can't believe this!

**Wherever I May Roam plays and Abdoli with Achmed Gunter come out. Abdoli grabs the mic.**
Abdoli: I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! I DEFEAT CREEL VIA SUBMISSION AT THE PAY PER VIEW AND YET I AM LEFT OUT OF THE LJW CHAMPION TOURNAMENT! I DESERVE A SHOT AT THE TITLE MORE THAN ANYBODY! This is discrimination at its biggest mark. This is worse than what happened to Michael Jackson!
Chris Byrd: W-what the hell?! Let's get to the next match!

**Highway to Hell plays and "The Sadistic Sex Machine"Steve Hakim makes his way out to the ring but before he can make it in Stevie D attacks him with a chair and viciously assaults him before the match even begins! Steve is knocked out on the rampway and medics and trainers rush out to help him. Steve Hakim is loaded up on a strecher and Stevie knocks it over making Steve fall on his face as the crowd boos. Steve is sent to the hospital for medical treatment as Stevie D grins with an evil smile on his face.**
Scoops Sullivan: I would imagine this means Steve Hakim is unable to compete due to this sick ambush! That would make Stevie D the winner by forfeit, I can't believe this!

**We go to the back and see Joe Hakim helping his brother Steve into the ambulance. One of the trainers tells Joe he has a match next and Joe says he's not leaving his brother as he closes himself inside the ambulance door and it drives off.**
Chris Byrd: I gu-guess that means Joe won't be participating either! N-n-n-n-o luck for these Hakim's tonight, huh Scoops?
Scoops Sullivan: I'm still shocked by this whole fiasco. Let's get to our last match of the night.

**My Enormous Penis by Da Vinci's Notebook plays as Black Inches makes his way out to the ring. Then Outlaws Like Us plays and Hargrove comes in reeking of cheap beer and ass.The match kicks off and they lock up, Black Inches pulls Hargove down on his face and then in an amateur wrestling move rolls around on Hargrove's back, then in a bed wrestling move begins to hump Hargrove! Hargrove grabs his own butt in fear as Black Inches laughs at him.Hargrove is angry and runs at him and Black Inches hits a drop toe hold on him and then attempts to put him in a figure four leglock but Hargrove pulls out from under and turns around to the crowd and points at his brain as if he's a genius but turns around to a right hand from Black Inches. Black Inches signals for the Money Shot and climbs up and splashes ontop of Hargrove for the win!**
Winner: Black Inches



Tournament Second Round Matches
Crispy vs Asombroso Azul

Rayther vs RSC


Jose Sanchez vs Stevie D

Triple M vs Black Inches